


Silicon Baby!:"If You Cant Adopt Homemade Is Fine"

by Sky_Chau



Series: Green Hills Project [2]
Category: Sonic the Hedgehog (2020), Sonic the Hedgehog - All Media Types
Genre: Characters and whatnot will be updated over time., Do still comment, I feed on your keysmashes, In this house we love and referance the robots movie, Is It Good?, M/M, No Idea, No longer beta read, Sonic is an idiot., Tom is a good dad, actually beta read, and learns like a child., as always, hell yes, holy fuck, is it funny?, less pin yourself to the wall, lots of art, metal is BABY, metal sonic is a machine learning ai, more look what came out of my eggsack, rated T for the stupid innuendos, stone and ivo are married, tails is like 8, theyre not even sexy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-03
Updated: 2020-10-18
Packaged: 2021-03-01 19:48:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,854
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23992558
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sky_Chau/pseuds/Sky_Chau
Summary: Stone wants a baby.Ivo builds him a wonderful metal son.Chaos ensues.
Relationships: Dr. Eggman | Dr. Robotnik & Agent Stone, Dr. Eggman | Dr. Robotnik & Metal Sonic, Dr. Eggman | Dr. Robotnik/Agent Stone, Knuckles The Echidna & Tom Wachowski, Maddie Wachowski/Tom Wachowski, Metal Sonic & Agent Stone, Miles "Tails" Prower & Tom Wachowski, Sonic the Hedgehog & Tom Wachowski
Series: Green Hills Project [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2000164
Comments: 32
Kudos: 175





	1. Baby Making

It’s been a year since Dr. Robotnik returned to earth, packing a few more pounds and a lot less hair than he left with. Stone made the decision to become a fugitive and run away with him to Green Hills where they now reside, scheming in a rural farmhouse with a Batcave Esq secret laboratory bunker. The house is lovely, still needs a few repairs, but that’s primarily due to the lack of effort put into fixing it. The two got married only months after Robotnik’s return. The ceremony was small but cute as it should be for the two outlaws. They adopted a cat, but Stone still feels as though something is… missing.

He’s been thinking about it for a while now. Stone has bit his tongue every time he thought he found the guts to ask in person. He wants a child. He knows the hard work and difficulty that may come with. Especially given that the two cannot have one biologically. What if Ivo says no?

What if Ivo leaves him for asking? 

That’s silly. This debacle is completely ridiculous, and his anxieties are not grounded in reality. So Stone brings it up over text like a coward.

“I want a baby.” Sent.

No going back now. Just have to twiddle his thumbs and wait for his husband to come storming up the lift to yell at him. Doing this while in the same building was maybe not the greatest idea Stone has ever come up with.

The doctor responds, “give me a week”

What the actual fuck does that mean? Stone replies “????” hoping to get Ivo to elaborate on how exactly he plans on obtaining a baby in only a week.

The thing with Ivo is he rarely explains what he’s doing. He’s either loudly maniacal or quietly cryptic about his plans. Either full James Bond villain or actually competent at keeping his secrets and there is no in between. Today the pendulum strikes cryptic so Ivo immediately jumps to:

“what color?”

Again, what the actual FUCK? Oh Jesus. Okay, Stone has to be extremely careful in how he answers this. 

“...Blue?” yeah, there are no blue children to kidnap in green hills, at least none his husband could actually catch. Harassing Sonic may be a hobby but deep down neither of them truly anticipate being able to catch the little bugger. Stone adds. “Ivo, please don’t racially profile orphans” just to be safe.

“Who said anything about orphans?” 

Ivo, no, why? That's worse. Way to make the kidnapping suspicion just that much more grounded.

“Ivo, none of what you’re saying makes the phrase ‘what color?’ any less concerning.”

“That sounds like a you problem. Can you bring me the scrap silicon from the garage?”

“You’re scaring me.” 

“I cannot imagine why that would be. Am I getting the silicon myself or not, love?”

“I’ll get it.”

Stone leaves his phone on the counter, making his way into the garage. There're piles and piles of robot junk mixed with raw materials. There’s a system to this mess, but that system is based on the periodic table (something Stone hasn’t had to care about since highschool). Which one was the silicon again? Stone returns to the kitchen quick googling what the atomic number for silicon is. It’s fourteen. Google also informs him he’s looking for a brittle metal substance and not the soft rubbery material (silicone) he had confused it for initially. Hooray for technology. Good, now he knows what sticker to look for. It’s only a hop, skip and a jump from the garage to the lift. To the Eggcave!

“The Eggcave” is the exact reason there will never be a fire pole entrance to the lab. Ever. Since Stone started calling the lab the Eggcave Ivo has been self conscious about decking the place out. To be honest, if the man just owned the Eggcave and went ham with it, everyone would be happier. 

The agent steps into the lab, silicon in hand. “Where do you want this?” He looks over to his husband sketching away at the holographics. 

“On the melding plate. Thank you, Stone,” Ivo looks back with a grin. 

“So about adoption. Are we doing this?”

“Of course not. We’re fugitives.” 

“Oh.” Stone deflates. He forgot about that.

“Chin up, making the baby is more fun anyway” Ivo grins the silicon is very suddenly melded into a vaguely phallic conical shape.

  
  


Stone chokes and looks at the silicon incredulous “Make a baby?!” He looks at Robotnik and back to the silicon and then back to Robotnik his face gradually morphing into one of disturbed understanding “sir I don’t think-“

“Hush dear, I know you don’t.” His husband brisks past, patting his head affectionately. 

“Sir-“

“Do you want to help make a baby or not?”

“...no” Stone says in fear, looking at the silicon spike. He may not be entirely sure where this is going, but if it’s in the gutter with his brains, he wants nothing to do with it.

“. I have to do all the work as usual” Ivo states, mumbling something that sounds like “pillow princess” at the end. 

“Go on, if you’re not going to help, get out.” 

Stone books it back up the lift. Nope, not gonna stick around to find out where that spike is gonna go. No, sir. Ivo stays hard at work in the Eggcave for a week, only taking breaks to eat. Stone really hopes this man is sleeping at some point down there too. In between  _ whatever  _ it is he’s doing down there. 

The week passes, and Stone receives an invitation to the lab via text. The lights are off in the lift and the eggcave itself. This is not an excellent sign. No, no, no it is not. He steps off the elevator and the lights flick on. There’s a bunch of balloons scattered about the floor. No helium, just a load of his man’s hot air. On the counter sits a lifeless robot replica of… Sonic? With a bow around its neck.

Ivo presents his invention, grinning with pride. 

  
  


“Ta Da!”


	2. Baby Metal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Metal is BABY

He steps off the elevator and the lights flick on. There’s a bunch of balloons scattered about the floor. No helium, just a load of his man’s hot air. On the counter sits a lifeless robot replica of… Sonic? With a bow around its neck.

Ivo presents his invention, grinning with pride. 

“Ta Da!”

Stone scratches his head looking confused, “What is it?”

“Our child” Ivo grumbles, a little offended. He put all this hard work into this masterpiece and Stone can’t even tell what it is. 

“I got that,” Stone elaborates “Why does he look like Sonic?”. Stone raises an eyebrow at his husband. Suddenly Ivo feels like an idiot.

“Is that not what you meant by blue?” His face turns red.

“...No. I mostly said that so you wouldn’t kidnap anyone.”

“Kidnap? Please, I built him so I WOULDN’T have to kidnap the blue child” Ivo crosses his arms and huffs. Why would he ever do such a thing? It’s not like he’s been attempting murder for fourteen months.

“We’re admitting Sonic is a child now?” Stone blinks incredulously. It’s one thing to know that Sonic is in fact thirteen years old. To say it out loud after scheming against him feels not only petty but briefly immoral.

Ivo shrugs, “I don’t see why not…?”

“We have been trying to kill him for over a year now. We just kill children now?”

“No, this is different. Most children do not have the capability to cause a continental blackout. Sonic is a dangerous exception that must be eradicated and used for SCIENCE..”

“And the fox?”

He fake smiles and furrows his brows looking to the side, “Collateral damage?”

Stone seems content with that answer. He shrugs the morality of child murder off with relative ease. “I can live with that”

“Good, I’d rather not have to divorce you.” he goes back to being his maniacal self, “Back to what’s really important. Look at our BOY!” He muses Stone, with a wicked grin and bouncy demeanor. 

“He’s not completely done yet. Still have to hook him up to a power source and upload the basic parameters for the deep learning AI. Just to give him a starting point.” Robotnik makes a few alterations and carefully inserts one of Sonic’s quills into the powercore.

“Deep learning?” Stone knows both of these words individually yet can’t seem to extract the meaning of the combination. As far as he is concerned machines lack the intuition to learn even the most basic of Stones typing patterns. (Stupid auto correct anyway).

“Self teaching AI. They learn by observation and trial and error, like children. Should be ready to go online soon” Robotnik hits a button on a hologram and delicately unplugs the machine from the suspended cords. Ivo flips a switch behind one of the bots panels and the lifeless doll hums with electricity.

Ivo steps back. “Come say hello to metal sonic”

“That’s the best name you could come up with?” Stone steps towards the bot. It’s lights flicker on and it straightens up its posture, still looking devoid of humanity. It doesn’t react to anything.

“Yes, Metal S. Robotnik!” Ivo scowls. He came here to have a good time, and he’s feeling really attacked right now.”Shut up and meet your son”

“It looks sort of… dead.” Stone looks back to his husband, who frowns at him. 

“Give him a minute he just woke up.”

The robot shifts, looking around. Its micro-camera is between its eyes, behind the glass. The lights in the screen are purely for show. It has to tilt its entire head up to see stone. He stares for a moment and the robot catches on quickly, changing the display on his screen to display false eyes as If they were looking at Stone. 

Metal attempts to speak. He currently only has the badnik voice bank so his syllables are limited. He should build a voice of his own given enough time. “Te-te?” He sounds so curious and excited to be here.

Stone melts “oh- hiii- “ his voice cracks in awe extending a hand to gently touch the metal faceplate, “gosh aren’t you just a cutie”. The urge to scoop the boy up is strong.

“no” the silicon child beeps out, emulating a blink on his screen. He is incredibly literal with his answers. If one were to ask him if he was anything other than his name at the moment the answer would be no. Even if the word describes him perfectly. The badnik language is adorable on its own, a mix of musical jibberish made from a selection of different vocaloid-like emulators. Metal speaking in a mix of soft high-pitched melodies and struggling to find syllables in his voice bank to speak English is nothing but cute to stone. The stubborn contradiction from the robot is so much more endearing when it's sung in a sweet little tune.

Stone’s eyes light up. “Oh! I love him” he looks over to the doctor before tackling him with a hug. “Thank you so much!”

Metal falls face first off the counter, fumbling with his limbs nonsensically. He stands up and makes his way over to his parents, but the movements are all wrong. Poorly observed, strictly to get the boy from point A to point B. Sillywalking at its finest. His cold metal arms wrap around Ivo as well. His small size means he only clings to the man’s leg, but the idea is still correct.

The parents blink at him. Stone breaks the silence “What was that?” 

“He learned to hug… I think.” 

“That’s adorable!”

“Ko du?” 

“Yes, Hi, this is your Daddy.” Ivo gestures to his husband. Stone is giddy to watch this unfold.

Metal points to Ivo spouting in badnik “du?” 

“Me? I’m your Father. I made you.” 

Metal does not respond.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter, but more art this time. Hope y'alls are enjoying this tooth rotting fluff.


	3. Party Plans And The Joys Of Parenting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stone arranges a birthday baby shower for Metal.

Tom wakes up to the sound of his phone ringing. He checks the caller ID bleary eyed and tired. Maddie is already up. She runs on farmer hours making her a much earlier riser than Tom has ever been expected to be. The only people to disturb are the boys. Tom blinks in disbelief. ‘Egg #2’? He thinks for a second. Oh! Right, that’s Stone. 

Tom sits up and answers just as the phone is running out of rings. “Heeey, nice to see you’ve finally come to your senses. I’d be glad to have your husband in handcuffs.” 

“In your dreams Tom” Stone snickers on the other end of the line.

He can hear the Doctor in the background asking “What’s so funny?”

Stone covers the receiver and looks to his husband with a mischievous look. “Tom says he wants you in handcuffs” 

“Kinky” Ivo smirks. The two laugh at their low brow humor.

Tom sighs, having overheard the whole side conversation despite Stone's efforts. He forgot how much of a mindfield it is to talk to these crackheads. “Anyway. What do you want?”

“I was wondering if you don’t have any plans today at noon if you could consider coming out to the farmhouse for a party.”

“Is this a trap?” Tom gets up and walks to the door, passing the phone over to his other ear.

“No, it’s a party.”

“So you’re just inviting me and my magic animals you keep trying to kill, to your secret lair.”

“For a Birthday Babyshower! The Mrs. is also invited.”

“Babyshower?” Tom says as he walks into whatever chaos Sonic and Tails have gotten into downstairs. The two trouble-makers ears perk up in attention. 

“Yes. It appears you can comprehend full sentences, Tom. Congratulations!” 

“What's a baby shower? I thought babies only took baths.” Sonic asks. 

“Not right now, I'm on the phone blue.” He grabs a few Tupperwares of leftovers, tucking them under his arm. He turns and heads outside to get the mail Tupperware in towe “You and Egghead had a baby?” 

“Of sorts.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“We made it ourselves.” Tom can hear Stone’s proud little smile through the soundwaves. 

“Hey Stone” He opens the mailbox to find it empty, and falling apart. He walks around to the other side of the mailbox. 

“Yes?” 

There’s a large fist shaped dent. Sonic must have picked a fight with Knuckles. This observation is further confirmed by Tails’s obvious handiwork at the base of the mailbox. Tom mentally thanks Tails for this. 

“You can’t just say things like that and not explain how two men well over 30 managed to make a baby.” 

“Well you see Tom when a Daddy and a Father love eachother very much-” oh God. Nope. He doesn't know how the talk would work with two grown men but Tom is not about to stick around and find out.

Tom cuts him off fast “Never mind I don’t want to know.”

“Enough messing around, do you plan on attending or not?” 

Tom looks around at the chaos that is his life and somehow comes to the conclusion that he has nothing better to do. “We’ll be there.” 

“Thank you Tom! Bye Bye!” Stone hangs up on him.

Tom heads out to the garage to check on the Echidna and his magic rocks. He's not going to pretend he understands what Knuckles and his rock collection's deal is. Knuckles is a pretty recent addition to the family and all Tom really gets is that the kid has a psychic link with the big rock, and his life's purpose is to protect said rock. Also the rock is his mom? 

Yeah whatever, he's older and better behaved than Sonic and Tails (so long as Sonic doesn't get too close to the rocks). Tom is more than willing to let the boy keep his secrets for now. He knocks on the side door before opening it. 

Knuckles winds down from his fighting stance when he sees it's Tom. 

"Just me. I'm re stocking your fridge… Saw what you did to the mailbox out there"

"Sorry" he hops down from atop his rock and helps put the food away.

"I'm not mad, I just wish you would tell me these things before I find them myself."

"Didn't Tails fix it?" Knuckles asks as he closes the fridge.

"He did, but he's eight, and it shows"

"Oh." Knuckles looks briefly embarrassed for not realizing this.

"So you wanna go to a baby shower?"

"I have a job to do"

"Right, Emeralds... Well you have food. Microwave. Phone. My number is on the fridge." Tom ruffles the Echidnas hair spikes "Call me if you need anything"

"Okay." Knuckles looks away. "One more thing?"

"Hm?" 

The little red echidna hugs him. "Thanks"

"No problem." Tom gives a sweet thumbs up. The teen lets go. 

Tom heads out. Time to explain baby showers to a couple of aliens. 

\----------

Meanwhile the Robotniks are busy throwing together last minute decorations for the party. With more than a weeks notice they could've custom ordered banners. Instead they had to settle for a banner that read "it's a boy". Ivo takes the liberty of correcting the sign in red. 

The sign now reads "it's a BADNIK!". Ivo looks over to the robochild and smiles. 

Metal appears to have discovered that he has feet, as he stares at them in awe. A metallic tapping can be heard as he bounces them lazily about the floor in no apparent pattern. All the party decorations in the world and Metal has decided his own feet are more interesting.

"What are you up to?" Stone asks raising an eyebrow.

"To" Metal's grasp of English phonetics is still not great. 

"Are you trying to say toes?"

"Ya Ya" 

"These are feet. You don't have toes." Stone motions to the ground.

"No?" Metal beeps and looks about in alarm. "NO?!" He stumbles off to his other father in distress making the dialup internet sound as he clings to the wall for silly walking support.

"FA-DA!" He calls.

Ivo looks up from his decorating, "What's wrong dear?"

"Ai ne to, ya?" Metal shakes his foot.

"No, daddy is right. you don't have toes, love." Ivo reassures his son.

The dial up sound gets louder. Parenting guides didn't mention having to explain to children why they don't need toes. Ivo is unprepared. Uhhhhh shit. "Naptime protocol activate!"

The robot clatters to the floor. That's one way to calm a kid down. Stone frowns in dissaprooval. Cake in one hand phone in the other. "Was that really necessary?"

"He asks too many questions."

"He's a child, that's what they do. You can't just knock the kid out every time he asks about … toes." Stone stares off into the distance "...Why did it have to be toes?"

To be continued...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Will add illustrations later. Be sure to check in a few days.


	4. Objective Rewards

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Metal Sonic meets Sonic.

Ivo and Stone are busy decorating for the party. Setting up tables and streamers inside of the unused barn. The barn was going to be the laboratory until they realized there was no safe way to connect the building to the power grid. It's still a nice space to have and acts as a second garage.

Meanwhile Metal looks around the barn in awe. He is fascinated by the ground in front of him. He grabs at the yellow needles of hay curiously as the adults continue their conversation. 

"Is this even?" Stone asks from atop the ladder.

"Yes but it's upside down" Ivo replies 

"Couldn't you have told me that before I nailed it in?"

"I thought you knew"

Metal thinks hay is cool. As Metal looks down he notices the slats in his turbine. So much empty space. The child stuffs hay into the turbine. He laughs. He determines that he is a scarecrow and his turbine's sole purpose is to store additional hay. You know, in case he runs out.

"Metal no!" Ivo calls in alarm.

"No?"

"No, we don't put things in here" he taps the head of the turbine.

"Ai du" 

"No. Bad. Putting things in the turbine hurts you." Ivo pouts.

"aaaa?" Metal was trying to say 'ouchie'.

Ivo makes a face. "Hmmm. I don't trust that." He pauses "naptime protocol activate." The droid falls over comically.

"Ivo!" Stone chides. 

"What? we have work to do and I don't trust him not to lodge something where it shouldn't be." 

Stone sighs shaking his head.

Hours later, Metal stirs from his sleep mode, motors coming to life with a soft hum. The micro camera is the last thing to come online. He surveys his surroundings to find he’s currently balanced on his daddy’s non-existent hip. Little sparks of ‘good’ run through his circuitry at this realization. 

“Da-Di?” Metal turns his head up to look at his daddy, motions still very unnatural.

“Oh! Hello. Did you have a nice nap?” 

“No.” Metal Sonic is not currently in possession of any ‘naps’.

“I’m sorry.” Stone pouts for a moment, “That’s alright. Look. There's a party going on. Come say hi” Stone lifts the robochild from himself and places him at the head of the picnic table. 

Metal can’t get a good read of the faces. There’s not enough context for him to piece together what they might be thinking. All his systems tell him is that most of them lean negative. Was it something he did? 

“C’mon, don’t be shy.” Daddy speaks. Metal looks over to him. “Say hi.”

“No.” he knows that's a word he would butcher. 

“Can you at least wave?” Daddy says looking stressed “Like this?”, he moves his hand via his elbow from side to side. Metal supposes he could do that. 

He karate chops the table gently, “YA!?”. Daddy laughs in response. Success!

Father clears his throat, “forgive the baby, he’s still… a baby.”

“Te-To KA.” (I’m baby) Metal beeps out in badnik switching the screen to display the smiling eyes he saw once in a cartoon. 

“Yes. yes you are, love. This is Metal Sonic. He is our son-”

“Hold on.” Brunette cop man stands up “Did you clone my kid?” 

“Technically he's a machine replica-” Father stops and looks over to Daddy who is running his finger across his throat, looking rather mad about it “that’s not helping my case, is it...” 

Metal is currently mentally occupied with breaking down other people's speech into syllables he can say. His methods are slow but thorough.

'Technically'

'Ta-' no.

'Te-Ne-' no.

'Te-Ke-' no.

'Te-Ki-Ne?' Close but no.

'Te-Ki-Ni-Ka-Di?' Sounds about as close as Metal thinks he can get but the last syllable doesn't quite work.

'Te-Ki-Ni-Ka-Yi?' Still no. This is hard :(

Suddenly all the adults are yelling and making a fuss. Some pointing at Metal. Metal doesn’t like this. He doesn’t know what the fuss is about. What did he do wrong? Was it something he said? 

"No, no it is not." The cop pinches his brow. "Turn that thing off. It's freaking me out"

"Tom can I have a word with you?" Father asks with an expression Metal doesn't recognize.

The two walk off beyond Metals field of vision. Metal beeps out "AaaAa?" in a sad attempt to say 'uh-oh'.

Daddy comes over and shooshes Metal. "It's alright. I think. Don't worry about it okay. How about we let the kids go play?"

"Look Stone, I'm going to be honest with you, this whole party feels like a trap. If Metal here weren't, y'know. A robot... I'd be more trusting." A dark skinned woman says from the other end of the table. She has a yellow animal in her lap and a blue one by her side.

The blue one immediately catches his attention. Something in his coding tells him that this particular hedgehog is of great importance to him. He doesn't recognize that this section of code exists but he can definitely feel his rewards system is in some way tied to this blue hedgehog. 

Metals Father purposely made it so Metal couldn't access his own code. He cannot under any circumstance be cognizant of the fact that he has code, meaning his objectives are as much a mystery to him as they are to Stone.

Daddy sighs "yeah, that's understandable I guess." Metal turns his head to his Daddy to read his face. It's sad. Oh no. Metal sets out to fix this. He performs a 'hug' on his Daddy's leg. Daddy smiles. Success!

Ivo coded the reward system to reward 4 things:  
Receiving paternal responses from Stone  
Receiving positive responses from Ivo  
Learning new things.  
The last thing is very complex and has a lot of conditions but roughly narrows down to the concept of Sonic.

Without an objective reward system the AI will determine that it is content doing nothing as that is the most energy efficient task it could be doing. Metal notably has the ability to unknowingly code his own objectives with a few limitations. This is done to ensure Metal doesn't learn to treat objectives like a checklist. It would be off putting to have one's child unnaturally driven to do a specific task all the time. The ability to add it's own objectives is meant to emulate having interests or hobbies.

The blue animal speaks up "so do I get to curl up into a ball and knock Metal out or what?"

Metal turns around to see the blue hedgehog standing in the dirt. The silicon baby reflexively says "No."

"Can I take him apart?" Asks the yellow… fox? Yes, that's definitely a fox. 

"No." Again a coded default answer to this particular question. 

"So your name is Sonic?"

"Ya-ya" Metal has three names and Sonic is indeed one of them.

"Mine too! That's so cool! Hey I bet I could beat you in tag."

"Ta-du?" 

"It's tag" Sonic corrects.

"Tats ai sayi" Metal adopts a self recorded 'S' sound from the fox. It's pitched and blends right in with his regular speech. Ideally Metal would've taken from Sonic but he talks a bit fast making him a difficult target. 

The badnik language while technically complex is very limited. Outside of combat the language is only good for communicating the needs of a machine. There's no words to convey a sense of desire or confusion. Hence why Metal has to record and mix a voice of his own over time.

"Yeesh, you are hard to understand"

"I think he's confused about tag" The fox helps Metal out.

"Oh my god Tails he doesn't know what tag is!" Sonic flops dramatically. "We HAVE to teach him"

"Ooh ooh! We should do teams! How fast can you run!" Sonic zips around in excitement.

Metal beeps confused.

"C'mon let's race! I bet you can't beat me to the top of the mountain!" Sonic teases.

Metal may not know how to run. But it is ON.

Metal has no idea what tag is or what it has to do with racing. He is determined to do whatever the hedgehog does. It takes a while for Metal to get the concept of tag. He has no problem listening to Sonic. In fact he wants nothing more than to hear his voice and chase him to the end of the earth. This drive to objective makes learning to walk and run suddenly very easy. He copies Sonic's every move until he gets the hang of it.

Soon the two are toe to toe. Tails is left behind as the two blue children chase each other across the countryside. Suddenly Metal has a new objective of his own division: "Get Sonic's attention and keep it."

It's late in the day when Metal and Sonic return. Stone rushes over to meet Metal. "Where were you? I was so worried!"

The cop agrees "You too little man. Next time tell us before you run off like that."

Meanwhile Ivo grins with pride at the sight of Metal keeping up with Sonic. To think that only a few hours ago he could barely walk is insane. Gosh they grow up so fast he could cry. Quick, he needs pictures before the baby grows again. 

As they take the banner down Maddie volunteers to take a picture. Metal in his cute little bow, Ivo in a party hat, and Stone grinning like an idiot. This. This is absolutely going on Facebook for Stones parents to be confused about.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will likely add additional illustrations at a later date. Its always worth a re-read.


	5. Life Alert

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Stone gets invited to dinner by his concerned mother and immediately falls in the bathtub.

“Stone, where in the world have you been!?”

“I can’t say that over this line” Stone leaves the house to grab the mail. Barefoot through the grass, he runs. Hoo boy the dew is colder than he expected.

“Oh, enough with that! First you drop off the map to work for some government agency, then I see your face in the news because you’re a wanted criminal, and now you have a CHILD?” 

“Yup.” Stone slips his hand into the mailbox, retrieving the items. He sifts through the stack, only half paying attention. Junk. Junk. Utility Bill that doesn’t need paying. Junk. 

“And you didn’t tell me?”

“Sorry, Mom.” This is exactly why he didn’t say anything. Stone knows his mother means well, but she always means such a fuss over everything.

“Who’s the lucky lady? Please. I don’t care who it is I just want to know what’s going on in your life” his mother pleads.

“Are you sure about that…?” Stone walks in the front door and immediately drops the mail in the trash.

“Yes. Please. Talk to me.”

“I got married 10 months ago to a man.” 

Awkward silence “Well. I mean, that’s certainly not what I expected, but I’m glad you’re telling me now. He treats you well? Yes?”

“Of course, Mom. Please-“

“What was his name again?”

“I never said it- Mom, I swear if you’re trying to Google this you will not get the right impression.”

“What has he been to jail? Sweetie, I wouldn’t judge based on that… plenty of criminals leave the system and go on to be perfectly normal members of society.”

“Uh about that.” He passes the phone to his other ear, “Yeah his name is Ivo Robotnik and we are both classified as fugitives at the moment.” 

The sound of his mother spitting out her drink is unmistakable “YOU MARRIED YOUR BOSS?!”

“I forgot I told you about my job that one time… I mean, technically speaking, I wasn’t under his employment on the day we got married.” Stone laughs. She will not like that.

“You’re a FUGITIVE? Stone! What in the world did you do!”

“I was insubordinate and went against direct orders when I helped Ivo return to Earth and stole back the trailer.”

“Insubordination isn’t so bad…”

“Yeah, tell that to Uncle Sam. He’s got me and my husband down for Treason.”

“Why?”

“Robotnik is a walking PR nightmare for the US government.” Stones parental instincts are tingling. He looks about for Metal. 

Metal is standing at the bottom of the stairs. He looks up to the top of the stairs to find a grumpy orange furball staring back like a deer in the headlights. Something in Metals simulated eyes sparks to life. 

“KI-TI!” (KITTY!). Metal runs up the carpeted stairs, thumping loudly after the feline. Stone runs after him.

“Metal no! Do not chase the cat!”

Metal stops in his tracks, “Wai not?” Yet another letter stolen from tails. 

“The cat doesn’t like it. It’s very rude!”

“Is that your child?” His mother laughs, “I’d love to have you and your family over for dinner. How about tomorrow night?”

“Mhm, anyway, I have errands to run! It was nice talking to you. Love you mom!” He hangs up the phone. “Okay Metal, Daddy is going to take a shower. I need you to promise me you won’t chase the cat.”

“Yes” 

“Yes, you will not chase poor Gerald?”

Metal nods nods nods. 

“Good. I love you. I’ll be back in a bit” Stone pats Metal on the head before closing the bathroom door.

This whole baby thing is causing him more stress than he realized. The hot steam does wonders to clear his mind and his sinuses. Seasonal allergies are a bitch. 

A loud boom from the egg cave knocks the shower caddy onto Stone’s foot. 

“Ow!” God damnit Ivo. Explosions from his husband’s lab are a regular occurrence at this point and raise no concern. This kind of noise is the primary reason they decided to live on a ten-acre farm. That and the isolation makes them harder to find. 

Stone lifts his foot to asses the damage and subsequently falls. “SHI- AW” he winces. Stone is getting perhaps a bit old for this.

Metal panics kicking the door open, leaning over the tub in alarm. “Aaaaaa?!?”

Stone pulls a towel onto himself to hide his figure. “GET OUT!” 

Metal digs through the cabinets and comes back with a bandaid. He is so worried about his daddy that he disobeys direct orders. 

“Thank you, sweetie” Stone groans “can you go get your father please” he sits up and turns the water off. 

Metal runs down the stairs and to the super secret lift. “FaDA!” 

“What is it, Mets?” 

“Dadi fall!” He waves his arms around in distress. 

“Daddy fell down the well?” Ivo jokes. 

“No!” Metal screeches. Oh, this is serious. He tugs Ivo to the upstairs bathroom. 

Ivo takes one step in. He is relieved to see that Stone is, in fact, not dead at the bottom of a well. He sees Stone glaring at Metal. “Metal, can you go check on Gerald for me?”

Metal runs off to go chase that poor cat.

Ivo looms over Stone “So do I need to get you life alert?” 

Stone rolls his eyes. “I’m not a frail old woman living alone.”

“I figured as much. Now really,” Ivo crouches down and asks quietly, “Did Metal hurt you?” 

“What? No! Your stupid explosions shook the entire house, and I slipped… I can’t move my right arm.” 

Ivo reaches out to feel along Stone's spine. The skin is soft, though he is far too concerned about the man’s health to get caught up on that  _ wonderful  _ detail. He lifts the arm and feels his shoulder. “You dislocated your shoulder.” 

“Do I need to call an ambulance?”

“No. I can put that back into place if you’ll let me.” He pulls the man to his feet by his good arm and instructs him to sit on the toilet. With gentle force and a loud pop, the shoulder is back in place. 

Stone rolls his shoulder “Damn.”

“I am also a medical doctor.”

“I keep forgetting.” Stone stands grabbing what would normally be Ivos towel had he not pulled his own into the running water. “So why did you ask if Metal hurt me?”

“The way you looked at him would indicate he might’ve malfunctioned...” Ivo clears his throat, not yet willing to admit that metal has weapons capabilities.

“Oh, no, I just don’t want to be nude in front of my child.” He wipes his face down “He brought me a bandaid, when I was seeking to get him out. It’s embarrassing.”

Ivo snorts “That’s adorable.”

To be continued…

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Out of all the chapters I think this one is the least funny so far.


End file.
